I just finished listening to Murder on the Orient Express narrated by Dan Stevens. I have a lot of thoughts about the plot, but I’m skipping all that today. Other non-plot thoughts!

1. Not looking forward to Johnny Depp as Hercule Poirot in the upcoming movie. Did we forget that he abused Amber Heard? Why is he still an A-list star? Also Poirot is supposed to be small and clever, and Depp is neither.
2. Audio recordings of books are so magical. How many takes does it take to get a good take? Do they splice together a zillion snippets or try to get a whole chapter in one go? Do the actors decide on the vocal characterizations themselves or is there, like, a committee?
3. I am enjoying Dan Stevens murmuring in my ear more than is probably seemly. His voice is delicious. I would listen to him read a grocery list, but instead I humbly suggest the collected works of Charlotte Stein for his next audio project. (I would say “sorry, mom” but she knows me). I’m adding Dan to my list of imaginary boyfriends in the Audiobook Narrator slot.

Overall I really enjoyed the book and the narration! I’ll probably see the movie too, maybe with a corresponding donation to a DV agency.